Illegal Fireworks Somehow Make a Bang In Seattle

fireworksAnother Fourth of July has come and gone. Another year of fires caused by fireworks, loss of fingers and hands by being blown off. Reading the Seattle Times today, I have to smile at all the articles complaining about people letting off their fireworks, causing damage and scaring animals.

Not that I find that funny, believe me, I really actually very much dislike fireworks. No, the part that is funny is how the articles say how surprised the writers are because fireworks are illegal in Seattle! Imagine that!

There is a LAW and Seattle-ites aren’t obeying it! The same Seattle-ites who think if they make all their little useless laws against guns that Seattle criminals will obey them.

Here’s a news flash for Seattle-ites (and lots of other people) – in the words of comedian Ron White, “You can’t fix stupid.” Stupid people think they are funny. There is always some dimwit who thinks it’s funny to set a firecracker off  behind me or that they are just oh-so-smart that their fireworks will always go straight up in the sky and not tip over and shoot straight at me.

But it has obviously happened to me. So I don’t like fireworks. As I stated in a previous column, I don’t try to outlaw something I personally don’t like, I simply avoid them. If I want to see fireworks I’ll go to a fireworks show, not spend any of my hard-earned money on stupid little fireworks and not be around people setting off home fireworks.

There will always be dimwits who think they have control over it all and/or who think they are funny. There will always be dimwits who think the laws apply to everyone but them. Unfortunately, I don’t see that getting any better any time soon. You see, Washington passed the law making pot legal.

Somehow I don’t think that a bunch of pot-smoking mommies and daddies are going to begat children who are in the running to compete with Einstein. And of course Seattle-ites were some of the most vocal proponents of the pot law.

It stands to reason then that all those new little non-Einsteins are going to be the next generation of dimwits living in Seattle who think all the fireworks laws aren’t going to pertain to them and how they are so much smarter than everyone else that they will never have accidents.

So give it up, Seattle. You will never make enough laws to get people to stop being stupid and to stop setting off fireworks. And you will never make enough laws to keep criminals from getting guns. The law-abiding people will stop using illegal fireworks, the law-abiding people will stop possessing guns, but all the people who think the laws apply to everyone but them will still be causing house fires, blowing their fingers off, and shooting law-abiding people.

You can’t fix stupid and you can’t legislate it away. What you can do is be prepared to respond to it and defend yourself and your property. For fireworks, you can stay home and keep a hose handy, watching for some idiot’s fireworks approaching your house.

For guns, you can choose to never go anywhere and also hope a person with a gun never breaks into your house. Or you can arm yourself the same way you would arm your house with a water hose against fireworks. Making useless laws that people will ignore will not stop you from being a victim of a person with a gun or of a person with fireworks. Do you see the connection yet, Seattle?

About the author: Nancy Keaton

Nancy Keaton lives in Chehalis, Washington with her family. She is mother of three and grandmother of three and has recently acquired the healthy love of guns, self-defense, hunting, and the Second Amendment. Nancy and her family are also a travel writing team and you can learn about fun in the Pacific Northwest by checking out their blog at Questions and comments can be emailed to Nancy at

View all articles by Nancy Keaton
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