BY LAURA ARGINTAR
As women, we are taught toapologize for several things that don’t warrant having to ask for forgiveness. Why should we have to say sorry for being particular or for putting ourselves first?
We need not feel bad about circumstances beyond our control, and we are entitled to live our lives as we see fit. After all, it’s better to ask for forgiveness than it is to ask for permission. Here is a list of 20 things women should not have to apologize for:
1. Having our period
There’s a lot we can say on the topic of periods because, frankly, the idea of having to apologize for enduring one week each month in which we cramp, bloat and worry about bleeding through our pants — all so that we can bear children and bring more hemorrhaging females into this world — is absolutely preposterous. We can all be leaders, not just bleeders.
2. Farting and pooping***
Okay, so maybe the polite thing to do after you pass gas is to excuse yourself, but that kind of formality is reserved for nuns and student tutors. Not to be graphic, but unless you took an award-winning dump that smelled so bad, it evacuated an entire Murray Hill pregame, you don’t need to show any remorse! Where do you think the classic “hit and run” criminal routine came from?! The sh*t and run, of course! ***(Personally, I like to call it “making a doodie,” but I’ve been told this is childish.)
3. Bra cup sizes
Big boobs, flat chests… I’ve always said, “Hugs over jugs,” and I maintain that. No matter where you lie on the spectrum, be grateful you have some. Even if you have none, love one: http://www.keep-a-breast.org/programs/i-love-boobies/.
Being able to take care of yourself and rely on yourself is a wonderful thing. Whether it’s financial independence, emotional independence or just being able to sit alone sipping iced coffee on a bench, it doesn’t matter, there’s no feeling bad about it. Anyone who makes you feel less for your strong sense of independence can go suck it.
5. Painting our faces
If you feel more confident wearing makeup, then, by all means, wear makeup! It’s fun and makes us feel like our best-dressed selves — what’s so bad about that? Even more, if you like to wear the entire CVS beauty aisle on your face all at once, then go for it — just so long as you don’t apologize for looking like Lil’ Kim.
6. Being Type-A
You love making to-do lists and hate being late almost as much as you hate when other people are late. As long as you don’t implode and leave your torched bits scattered everywhere, you don’t need to say sorry.
7. Looking like hell
Apologizing for the way you look just gives others the go-ahead to mock your appearance. Unless you’re of the Gwenyth Paltrow variety, no one expects you to look flawless all the time.
8. Being girly
Since when did being “girly” become a bad thing? Why do we have to feel bad about obsessing over each other’s hair, watching “How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days” on repeat and indulging in manicures? Girly stuff is really, really fun and it sure beats watching guys tackling each other for four hours.
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